I've said it before...

I love Castle!!!!!!!

And the Journey continues.

My retirement plans have taken me to some strange places. Because I don't want to leave too much for Steve to do when I'm gone I need to make sure I have my final plans paid for. It sounds kinda morbid but I am now older than either sister lived to be but then my dad was 95 so it could, literally, happen at any time.

Do you know that you can buy a granite grave marker, online, for $195 including shipping? Sounds like a pretty good deal. I want to be cremated and my ashes spread around but I would like a marker in the family plot so people will know I existed.

Then I filled out a form under 'funeral insurance' so I'd have it all paid for and can just leave the policy but now I'm getting calls or life insurance. For $25 a month, I can have $10,000 worth of whole life insurance, whatever that means. I've never worried too much about life insurance in the past, I just wanted enough to bury me (or whatever, see above). My company provides $50,000 but that will go away when I retire. In spite of the financial benefits, I'd just as soon wait. So do I pay $25 a month to get the $10,000 or do I just save it and hope I live long enough to get to $10,000 on my own? Ah, dilemmas.

I didn't order the grave marker, even though I like the price. I could I guess and put it in the closet. Then Steve could just put it in the plot, by the girls. But I want a double t on it so I'll shop around later.

I hope I live til later because I'm sure putting stuff off!!

Yep, it sounds like me...to a T

This is a poem that pretty much reflects my life..

Spoon River Anthology
George Gray
Edgar Lee Masters

I have studied many times
The marble which was chiseled for me--
A boat with a furled sail at rest in a harbor.

In truth it pictures not my destination
But my life.

For love was offered me and I shrank from its disillusionment;
Sorrow knocked at my door, but I was afraid;
Ambition called to me, but I dreaded the chances.
Yet all the while I hungered for meaning in my life.

And now I know that we must lift the sail
And catch the winds of destiny
Wherever they drive the boat.

To put meaning in one's life may end in madness,
But life without meaning is the torture
Of restlessness and vague desire--

It is a boat longing for the sea and yet afraid.

Ugly Bety Cancelled

I'm sad today because I found out they cancelled 'Ugly Betty'. I really, really like this show. This was an intelligent show with heart and a sense of humor, a fun cast and a heroine that we wanted to root for.

There are so few things on TV that I think are worth watching. So much crap on every day. But this was a quality show that probably had ratings trouble up against Survivor so instead of moving it to a decent time, sent it to Friday night Siberia to die. ABC idiots.

Robert B Parker

Today I read that one of my favorite authors, Robert B Parker died. I am very sad. Among other characters, he created Spenser (with an 's', like the poet, no first name ever given). Spenser is a Boston 'private cop' who along with best friend Hawk, longtime girl Susan and their shared dog Pearl and various buddies on both sides of the law has solved crime for 30 years. He was always "armed to the teeth, dressed to the nines". He was intelligent, loved to cook, loyal to a fault and, over the years, a literary friend. I will miss him greatly.

I used to have a quote taped to my desk from one of his books that I copied because sometimes it fit, "I am in an advanced state of ill humor". Learning of his death, nothing could be closer to the truth.

RIP RBP

Grave Divining?

A couple of weeks ago, Jan and I went to Spur to take some flowers down to Mom and the girls and while we were there, we were going to search for a grave for a girl on a genealogy website who wanted a picture of her grandparents graves. While we had the location on paper, we were not sure where to start. While we were at lunch, we struck a conversation with a girl who called the 'cemetary historian' Jack Alexander who agreed to meet us at the cemetary to direct us. I do love a small town.

Anyhoo...Jack met us and we found our grave in no time. Then he showed us something I'd never heard of. He removed divining rods from his truck and proceeded to show us that he could walk over a grave and if the rods crossed it was a female in the grave and if they went separate directions it was male. And it seemed to work everytime. It was pretty cool.

Globetrotters!!!

When I was a little girl, growing up in a small town, we got the Globetrotter lite teams. Not the big timers, not Meadowlark and Curly, but the guys who were almost good enough. They were great to us. I actually only think I saw them once but it is a good memory.

Last night I got to see the big guys, in person. Today it's Handles who is the crown prince. And as usual, he has a supporting cast of extremely talented basketball players and showmen. It's funny, after all of the years, some of the routines are the same. You know there is going to be a water fight and someone is gonna get wet. And this time it was me!!! It was sooooo cool!!!


They danced and they played football. They provided a good clean show, appropriate for kids of all ages. I loved it!!

SVU Overload

The DVR was set on "all" when I set it to record Law & Order SVU. I love El & O & Munch & Fin and Cragen. But enough is enough. I've seen too many in the last few days. And it's time to delete.
I need something postive.

On the other hand there are a lot of Guiding Light alun here & I like it. Gina Tognoni, Tom O'Rourke, Hayden Paneteirre, Beth Ehlers, Britany Snow, the people who played Sandy Foster,
Remy, Max. It's old home week, I miss GL. Damn CBS.

Retirement is complicated...

I have a lot of decisions to make in the next few months. I'll need monthly money but I'm not sure how to draw it. What to do next. Where to live. My brain is so full right now.

The one decision I'm not questioning is the decision to retire. Even with so much in the air I have made the right decision. The timing is right.

Let the adventure begin.

Never talk to a man about a diet...or lifestyle change..

Today I had a conversation with my friend Dusty, a man who is 20 years younger than me. He dropped in casual conversation that he'd lost 15 pounds since Thanksgiving. He's eating chicken and drinking water. That's it.

I have lost 17 pounds since July on Weight Watchers. The truth is I am no dieting angel. And I'm not willing to eat chicken and drink water. Life is too short.

Dusty is a boy and 20 years younger so our metabolism is different or so we are perpetually told.

Never talk diet with a man. It will only frustrate you.

Leap Year, the Movie **Spoiler**

I went to a movie yesterday called 'Leap Year'. The premise is that Amy Adams is a high strung realtor in Boston who has been dating a doctor for a few years and is disappointed when he gives her earrings instead of the engagement ring she was expecting. When he goes to Dublin on a business trip, she decides to take matters in her own hands and take advantage of an Irish legend that allows the women to propose to their men on Feb 29. She heads to Ireland where a series of disasters leads her to a down called Dingle where she makes a deal with a bar owner/hotel owner/taxi driver naned Declan to get her to Dublin by the big day. The disasters continue and the inevitable happens... and we all know the doctor is history. Good choice, that Declan.

Amy Adams has the lead and the kid is a charmer. She is a very pretty girl, amazingly even more without makeup. I cannot imagine many of today's actresses who would even appear on screen bare faced. She has a classic 40's actress look.

It's not Casablanca but it was pretty good.

Today was a good day...

In a few ways, actually.

I ate pretty good today...enough but not too much. Good leftover spaghetti, not too much.

I've really tried not to do it but the truth is I've kinda checked out at work. I've been looking forward and not really at the tasks at hand. In 5 months I will make the biggest decision of my life. I should be afraid but I'm not. But that is for another day. I enjoyed today. No one else will understand it but I felt a little fire again today. And I need that fire to survive the next few months.

Sign in Store

I was in a store the other day and they had a sign that said:

'Unattended children will be given an expresso and an puppy.'

Back on Track

I haven't weighed but dont think I've gained too much. But I have gained a little. And I am miserable, absolutely miserable.

I went to AnneMarie's tonight and several of us at the table were talking about weight issues, body image and why we eat. I've been overweight all of my life and thought that just in the last 6 months I had a handle on things but for some reason now I'm not sure. I'm overeating and I don't know why. For some reason, I can't stop. I stopped going to Weight Watcher's meetings to save $$ but I'm still trying to follow the program, because I know it works. I need to get back on track,

So I'm gonna try writing about this journey on a regular basis, good or bad.

Today I went to the movies. I did the right thing when I started the day. I had eggs and toast so I'd not eat at the movies., But then I went to the store on the way to get a Diet Coke and I bought peanuts for the Coke and then they had king size Reese's PB cups on sale so I bought those. My good intentions turned into a Diet Coke, 2 packs of peanuts and 4 Reese's cups, I felt like a slug but kept eating.

Then I ate cheesecake and chips at at AnneMarie's. Slug.

The holidays are over. I am miserable. Please, God, help me get back on track.

2010 Alamo Bowl. Part 2

Winner, winner chicken dinner!!

Way to go Red Raiders. Great job Ruffan. Make the right call Tech.

2010 Alamo Bowl

We have had drama this week. Our beloved, yet strange, Coach Mike Leach was fired by Texas Tech and the fan base is outraged. I am outraged. He disciplined a player whose dad works for ESPN and who filed a complaint & the university administration used it as an excuse to get rid of someone they did not like. They could not get rid of him during contract negotiations and when this deal came up, they jumped on it. Suspension without investigation. Fired on December 31. If he'd made it through the day, Tech would have had to pay him an $800,000 bonus. But he didn't make it through the day. Now we have blogs and covert emails and conspiracy rumors out the wazoo and the University will end up paying him a lot more than that bonus amount for how this was handled.
The administration does not understand what they have done. Oh, they got rid of a man who gave them the respect they deserved. And they set a football program back decades. We were on the map and are sadly going to spiral down in a hurry. And they took the hope from Tech fans. For years, I expected Tech to be the one on their faces in the end zone, the football inches out of reach. It took a while but Coach Leach finally had me at a point where I could think "we are 3 touchdowns behind but we have 5 minutes...we could win!!". He showed me we could. He made me believe and I liked that. I liked the excitement for Tech football, the buzz around town. And it's gone.

I hope we can get it back. The angry fans are going to let their ire be seen...in ticket sales, in donations to the University. I won't be paying as long as this administration is gone. And the administration is going to be shaking their clueless little heads wondering what happened.

I love Tech football. You can see by previous posts over the years how much. Leach is gone. I want this to heal. I want our team to do well. Guns up Red Raiders...lets kick Michigan State Spartan butt!!!

Bucket List

1. Trip to Italy
2. Trip to New York
3. Trip to Hawaii
4. Trip to Orlando
5. Retire fron AT&T
6. Jump from airplane
7. Single number pant size
8. Zip Line


To be continued...