It's about to be 2010!!!

2009 is almost over. The first decade of the 21st century is almost over.

I have great hopes for 2010. I am, perhaps foolishly, about to enter my 25th and last year of employment at Southwestern Bell/AT&T. In June I will walk away from a steady job and a good salary and into the unknown. I'm a person who has always needed security and I am amazingly calm about the steps I am about to take. I don't know where those steps are leading but I can hardly wait to take them. I am stepping out on faith...in God, in myself, in the world around me.

I'm going to try to write here more, even though no one really reads it. I need to write it anyway. I try for some resolutions every year and they normally don't work but I need to try anyway.

I hope to continue the weight loss. I feel so much better.

I will try to eliminate negative influences in my life. Dr Phil says those that who don't contribute
contaminate.

I will try to save more money. I'm about to have no choice. I am about to become a possible bag lady.

I want to get to church again. I want to be in a place to worship. I need it.

I need to meet new people. I need to learn to trust. I need to embrace those who reach out to me.

I need to be kinder.

I need to read more.

Daddys are important

Mine certainly was.

I was sitting at a restaurant today waiting on my takeout and overheard a conversation between 2 women, possibly mother and daughter, both were adults. They were discussing the daughters of the younger woman and she said one of them was more likely than the other to come home pregnant because she had "the daddy love" issues. The mom then went into a tirade about her kids' dad who does not see them much. Dad is a jerk, no doubt. I don't know him but he's a jerk. But mommy has responsabilities too. She chose a jerk to make babies with. Or maybe she chose a man who did not want kids. Or maybe she made a unilateral decision to have a baby, hoping daddy would just fall into place. I've seen it happen a hundred times. Literally. I work with women with 3 or 4 kids, separate fathers, born from booty calls, not relationships and then these women expect daddy to be happy about the situation. They then wonder how their kids got so screwed up and go through life singing the single mom bullshit song.

Don't get me wrong. It takes 2 to play and consequences & responsabilities almost always fall on the mom, the primary caretaker. But women need to look at the person they decide to make a baby with and decide what kind of dad he'll be before the baby is a reality. Before the booty call, think of your child and whether they'll have "the daddy love" issues as they grow up. Moms should make better decisions.

I grew up with parents who were GASP!!! married to each other for almost 60 years and who were rocks in all our lives. Are daddys important? You are darn tootin they are!!

Bravo TV -- Unique.

I'll admit that I'm pretty much a Bravo junkie...Top Chef is a favorite, even if I don't really cook much and frankly don't understand more than half of what they do or think that every thing they cook looks like anything I'd actually eat but I love the competition and the snobbiness of their
profession. They don't ever admit their stuff tastes like crap...the judges are just too stupid to understand their progressive point of view.

I like Tabetha and Jeff Lewis too.

That being said, where do they find the contestants on these shows? A new show 'Launch My Line" just started tonight and geeze Louise, there are some unique people in this world. These are non designers who want to be fashion mavens and are paired with alleged real designers, at least for tonight. Guess we'll see if they come back. This is a possible freaky trainwreck and I've already set the DVR.

The hosts of the show are twin designers whose actual names I missed but they go by D Squared. Unique.

Game Shows

Yes, it is almost time for me to go back to work. But til then, I got stuff to say.

I have always loved game shows. Jeopardy...the best. Wheel? Love it. Millionaire with Meredith Viera? Check, Sorry Regis...Uncheck. Annoying.

There is actually a Game Show Network on cable and it is full of old reruns full of people who are now dead but who will be forever young, There are new shows and remakes of old shows too. The oldies are better but I like Lingo and Chain Reaction although the contestants seem a little...ummm...scarily clueless and unimformed.

I'd like to see my 2nd favorite....after Jeopardy...an old show called Split Second with Tom Kennedy as the host. Loved that show. GSN are you listening?

Oh, and Alfonso Riberio looks a little constipated. Carnie Wilson is kinda creepy. Chuck Woolery is Dick Clark scary young and can hold his own and does not need a bimbo co-host. My friend Drew wants to be a game show host and he'd be fabulous on any of the shows. GSN are you listening?????

White Collar

I'm not a complete grump on this blog.

I love 'White Collar", the FBI/Con Man show on USA. I don't know the FBI agent actor's name although I have become a fan. I'll get it. But the con man is Matt Bomer, the hottest and last Ben Reade on Guiding Light. I thought the kid was pretty talented then but he has certainly come into his charming own as Neil Caffrey, the con who was released into the FBI agent's custody to help out with a case and who has now become his quasi partner. Neil 's alternate motive is to find his
ex Kate, who has disappeared. But while he's trying to figure out the Kate mystery, we get to watch his sexy intelligence, his beautiful blue eyes, his flirtiness and his chemistry with everyone around him.

Love it, love it, love it!!!

Joy to the World? Not really,..

I am admittedly not in the Christmas spirit. I'm facing my 1st Christmas without family and have for years had a hard time with the holiday season. It's cliche but I hate the commercialization of Christmas. I hate the Christmas stuff in the stores in September. I hate advertisers taking traditional Christmas carols and changing the words to suit their products. I hate the unrealistic Hallmark families singing in front of their Wii and the pictures of them sitting around the candlelit table while dad carves the turkey.

I warned you that I'm grumpy.

Today I went to the mall, a horrible place in general. I went for a few things. First I went to Barnes & Noble to see their new reader called a Nook. I have read about it and know the release has been delayed til January but was hoping they would have a demo but nada. The guy hoped to have at least a demo by Christmas. Too late for me. I've made my last trip to the mall. Not here by Christmas? What a brain fart. Actually the 2nd one. Moving to the mall was brain fart 1.

My 2nd stop at the mall was the Salvation Army Angel Tree, a Christmas tradition for me for t he last 20 or so years. This year, there were ornaments on the trees...1st names and ages only. In the past years, they had sizes and wishes but this year, nada. I'm told by the person manning the tree and they man at the office that they made a decision this year to let me make the call for the gift. Me, the person who has no kids. The person who does not know what size a 12 year old is. The person who does not know what toys are hot. The decision I decided to make was to walk away and not get either of the 2 ornaments I normally get. The guy at the office said their donations have doubled. It's December 1st. I have a BS flag to throw on that one. I predict whining on TV about the hard times before this is all over.

My 3rd stop was Dillards to buy new perfume since mine is almost empty. I wear Armani Mania, a not really cheap perfume that they apparently have either stopped making or Dillards has stopped carrying. The perfume floorwalker actually turned her nose up at me and told me that I might get it a Drug Emporium. The good news is that I did.

Any future purchases will be made online. Buh bye mall.

I don't want to feel this way. I remember Christmas as a child and I really looked forward to it. But in the past few years, it's been little but fighting for holiday time slots and the obligations of buying presents because it's what's expected. I find no joy, thats for sure. Only 26 shopping days til it's all over.