Holiday Failure

I am a holiday failure. 

I pin the right stuff and like the right stuff and I admire the beautiful pictures from Southern Living and I drool over the recipes from Paula Deen but the truth is, I don’t ever do any of it.

None of this stuff is what I grew up with for holidays.  Mom would do chicken and dressing or ham for Thanksgiving and Christmas and a simple fruit salad…apples,oranges,bananas,pecans,cool whip…and we all loved that salad.  Even my nephew thinks Thanksgiving needs that.  And she’d make pies.  And we all looked forward to it. 

I always think people all dressed up, eating off china and drinking wine look good, but it’s not for me. 

I’m invited places and I really do appreciate the invitations and as much as I like the family, they aren’t mine. Even when Steve used to invite me, I never felt welcome.  Because, basically, even they are all still strangers.  I have actually become my Uncle Raymond, my daddy’s bachelor older brother who was the last present under the tree, a few socks.  I have chosen not to be Uncle Raymond the last few years because I feel how he must have all the years.  Steve and I have agreed not to do holidays.

I hope there are thousands of good memories made.  I have mine.  And this year, and future years,

I choose to hold onto those and miss my family.  It sounds sad but it really isn’t.  I look forward to time off more than anything.

Maybe, someday, I will find something that changes my mind.